She's trying her best to preserve what's left of her innocence. Uo-chan likes to tease her, call her "sweet, innocent Tohru," but that's because Uo-chan doesn't know. Tohru is never, ever going to tell her, either. To be fair - which Tohru naturally is - they didn't try to steal her innocence. It's just another part of their curse, and they're much more worried about people finding out than they are about Tohru's pure mind. Which, she tells herself, is as it should be.

It's just that she's seventeen, which is a difficult age to remain completely innocent at anyway. She lives with three boys - men - two boys and a man? - which most people would think means she's far, far from innocent. Even with all that, she thinks, she might have managed a bit better but for one thing: she's seen them all naked. Completely, utterly, stark-as-the-day-they-were-born naked. It doesn't matter how quickly she covers her eyes and turns around, each time it's like another image is burned into her eyes and mind and she is never, ever, going to be able to get rid of it.

Maybe, she thinks, it wouldn't be so bad if there were more girls (she loves all the junishi, and doesn't want them to change, but there aren't that many girls). It's not such a big deal when Kagura, or Kisa, or Rin transforms; a naked girl is still naked, but Tohru has had time to come to terms with the anatomy involved. After all, she's a girl, her mother was a girl, Uo-chan and Hana-chan are girls... which isn't to say that she's comfortable, but the sight of a naked girl doesn't destroy her innocence the way a boy does.

There are a lot more boys in the junishi, and they're far more careless than the girls are. Or maybe it's just that they're all equally comfortable around her, but the girls don't transform when they bump into her. In a way, she hopes that's the reason, but at the same time, she wishes they'd be more careful. One very quiet, secret part of her hopes they won't be.

It's that little secret part that tells Tohru her innocence is well and truly gone. It's gotten stronger as she's gotten older, and it thinks of the most horrid, fascinating things. Like what Yuki and Kyou will look like when they're older, or how Shigure looks now. Or who looks the best without their clothes on.

Not even that dark little part of her will rank the girls, although Rin is absolutely gorgeous, whatever she wears (as absolutely anyone can see). She won't rank Hiro in there, either - however hard he tries to be grown up, he's just a little boy. If he's anything like his relatives, though, in five or six years it won't matter how much younger he is than her. But, for now, she thinks of Hiro as a cute (prickly, sarcastic, pessimistic) little brother.

Sometimes the dark little part balks at considering Ritsu, as well, since he looks so much like a girl. But then an even darker part will remind her that, without his clothes on, Ritsu is very definitely a guy. A thin guy, yes, without much muscle, and a delicate build even when compared to his relatives, and long hair that Tohru is completely in awe and envy of. But still a guy. Not, however, a very high ranking one, at least as far as that dark little mind is concerned.

Then there's Momiji. He's adorable, and she loves him dearly, but it'll be another few years before he goes beyond cute. He's a shining ball of sunshine without the least bit of shame or modesty. She thinks it's largely his fault her innocence has been so corrupted: he was the one who kissed her the first time she met him, the one who insisted on sleeping with her when she still thought he was a little boy, the one who takes every opportunity to hug or snuggle with her (and then transform). But Momiji without his clothes is a lot like Momiji with his clothes, only there's a few more people shouting at him to stop whatever it is he's doing. He's not the sort of inspire torrid fantasies in a teenage girl, even one as corrupted as Tohru thinks she might be.

Ayame and Hatori, in contrast, most definitely are. Ayame might have long hair, a slim figure, and girly clothes (she's even seen him in a wedding dress) but that slimness comes from sleek muscles under luminous skin, not skinniness. He moves with a grace, and there's elegance in everything he does. He's the sort of person that, once you've seen them naked once, you cannot see them clothed without imagining it. Ayame is romance personified, and that he knows it only makes him more attractive. She thinks that his shop must do so well because what Ayame sells is romance, and there is nothing and no one more romantic than Ayame.

While Ayame inspires daydreams of candlelit dinners and walks on the beach and dancing late into the night, Hatori is the sort that inspires daydreams of an entirely different sort. He's larger than Ayame, less graceful, but he carries the extra size with self-possession. Hatori is not light, flighty romance - he's coiled, pure intensity, a cool demeanor with a hidden fire ready to burst out. Hatori is sexy. It's easy to imagine him being passionate and fierce - he's a dragon, after all - but his gentleness is even easier to remember. She's felt his hands on her before, when she's been injured; gentle, kind, careful not to cause her the least discomfort. Those memories make the daydreams even harder to banish.

There's no daydreams about Hatsuharu. Haru is, possibly, even sexier than Hatori, but that might just be because he's closer to her age, so she's less embarrassed to think of it. But Haru loves Yuki, and he loves Rin, and in a way he might sort of love Momiji. Somehow, this lifts him up, out of the realm of daydreams, and she (or at least, the dark little part of her mind) can appreciate him in an entirely aesthetic way.

It's about this time in her consideration of those responsible for her loss of innocence that Tohru always makes a startling, embarrassing discovery: she lives with the three sexiest Sohma men there are. And, since they're Sohma's, that means they might even be the sexiest men alive. It's quite enough to make a girl flush red all over. There's Yuki, the prince, who really is perfect in every way but still completely human, delicate yet strong, with gorgeous purple eyes. And Kyou, who's fierce and awkward, but sweet underneath, his skin tanned over hard muscles gained from his training. Finally, there's Shigure, the mature man with the wicked eyes, easy smile, and kind words, who calls her a princess and a flower and sometimes remembers to treat her like one.

The dark little part of her mind has come up with more fantasies than she can count involving these three. Some of them are innocent - a picnic, tea with Shigure, visiting Yuki's garden, sitting on the roof with Kyou, a trip to the onsen... many, in fact, are simply memories of the times she's spent with them. Others, that have grown more frequent of late, are far less innocent. Sometimes she finds herself grateful for the curse, which makes them impossible, although she feels guilty immediately afterwards.

When that sort of fantasy creeps into her head, the best way to get it out is good, clean work. The house is immaculate and sparkling, the food exquisite, in the face of her determination to preserve her disappearing innocence. She's wouldn't give up living with the Sohma's for anything, but she's not going to give up her purity without a fight either.

There was a fantastic smell drifting over from the kitchen. Shigure followed his nose, a slight grin on his face. Tohru's cooking, already amazing, had gotten even better over the last couple of weeks. He wondered about the reason.

It was about time for him to get a haircut, he thought. It didn't bother him too much most of the time, but when it was wet after his bath, like now, it hung in his eyes. Peeking in the kitchen, he pushed his hair out of his eyes so he could see his delightful little cook. "What are you making, my flower?" he asked.

Tohru turned to face him, a ready smile on her face. He watched with interest as she froze, turned bright red, and spun back to face the stove. "Food," she squeaked. "Rice. Fish." She sounded distinctly breathless.

Grinning, Shigure loosened his yukata a little more and went to wait for his dinner. It looked like he'd been right, and things were going to be a lot more fun from now on. He didn't mind in the least: you were only seventeen once, and Tohru-chan looked so cute when she was trying not to think perverted thoughts.